Wednesday-Dec 15 2010

It's been a while since i updated this page. Recently, i was busy with my final year examinations. In the middle of this lonely and stressful period, i "saw" an angel. ^0^

あなたは私の天使です--->

"Mouth Watering Delicacies "

Friday-Oct 15 2010

Viewing my screwed up results is the "best" way to start off my day. Actually i wasn't expecting any great achievements in the examinations but at least i can get a result that can mantain my current cgpa. Kinda dissapointed i guess. Hmm~ Better luck next sem i guess. T.T

Monday-Oct 11 2010

Well, its been a while since i last updated this blog. September is a busy month for me. You can say that again when u have to deal with your final examinations and battle with your illness for a whole week long. It's really tiring. However, i feels a lot better now. Not only in terms of physical conditions but also emotionally. When i was lying on my sickbed, i realised how much concerns given by people around me. When am i going to turn mature? Why am i always hurt the feelings of people around me? It's time to wake up. Suddenly, a song came across my mind, "Wake me up when September ends by Greenday" . Therefore, i decided to wake up from this long "sleep" of mine. It's time to move forward and enjoy my life with my friends and families ^0^v

Wake Me Up When September Ends

Summer has come and passed
The innocent can never last
wake me up when September ends

like my father's come to pass
seven years has gone so fast
wake me up when September ends

here comes the rain again
falling from the stars
drenched in my pain again
becoming who we are

as my memory rests
but never forgets what I lost
wake me up when September ends

summer has come and passed
the innocent can never last
wake me up when September ends

ring out the bells again
like we did when spring began
wake me up when September ends

here comes the rain again
falling from the stars
drenched in my pain again
becoming who we are

as my memory rests
but never forgets what I lost
wake me up when September ends

Summer has come and passed
The innocent can never last
wake me up when September ends

like my father's come to pass
twenty years has gone so fast
wake me up when September ends
wake me up when September ends
wake me up when September ends

Tuesday-Sept 14 2010

Well, its a morning that differ from any other days cause its an examination "fever" now. Hanging around aimlessly, sleeping for longer period and consuming lots of unhealthy junk food. Thats how i spent my time recently. Stuck in a moodless infinity where no light of hope could be seen. Tonnes of "prescription" and encouragement given, yet it slowly take effects. Always wondering, how much time i needs to overcome it? In sum, i have to continue my journey even though i am blind folded.

LEGEND OF TEA
VEGAS' OBAMA BURGER

VEGAS' POTATO SALAD

Tuesday-Aug 31 2010

Today is the independence day of my beloved country, Malaysia and the day that i am going back to Kampar. I was having some quality times with my friends today. We went for movies, shopping and grab some desserts. It was a fun outing and i appreciate my time together with them. Not much happening around me and nothing much to comment about my feelings now. I will leave it aside for the meantime. Good night.z.z.Z

Tuesday-Aug 24 2010

My insomnia is getting worst from day to day. Besides, my heart keeps on bleeding because i am unable to comfort you. I doesn't know how deep is your wound but still I can imagine your pain. Not much I know about it, but I hope you may get over it soon. No more tears should shred from your beautiful round eyes. Only images of concerns people could be seen through it. I wanted to say "you are freed from your dark pass and work hard to pave a new path , that is full of hope and happiness". I wanted to be your umbrella , so that i am able to protect you from any harm. I will be your wand, so that i can accompany and support you along your whole journey. Therefore, I would always be there for you, whenever you need me^0^v

Monday- Aug 23 2010

Well, yesterday we went to Bidor to enjoy the mouth watering "wan ton mee". The price is quite reasonable for its taste. (RM 3.80 for small and RM 5.00 for large) You can't get one of this in Kampar. Even though the place is about 30-45 minutes away from Kampar, it's consider as worthy. Thanks to my friends for giving me such an opportunity to follow them, enjoying such delicacies.

However, it seems that my insomnia is back. I guess that it was mainly about missing you. I always thought and said that i will not feels sad when you found someone that you loves. Eventually, I was wrong. For the past few days, I was thinking that this incident might happen in the future and i can't do anything to stop it from hurting myself. I wish my love life can be less complicated. Good night.z.z.Z

Saturday- Aug 21 2010

Looking through your blog again. As usual, i am feeling uneasy and curios about your current conditions and feelings. Besides, I felt that our distance is getting farer day by day. I hate this kind of feeling. As thou my heart was empty and my senses couldn't work normally. But, I understands that we will just remain as friends. Therefore, I will bury this feelings of mine deep inside my soul , so that we can still remain as what we are now.
Speaking of the word friendship, it was easily slipt out from our tongue but how much do we understands it? It was so abstract and more to emotional aspects rather than the cognitive. Different people may have different perceptions about friendship. Therefore, they always said that it was hard to build a friendship and it gets tougher when we try to maintain it. Hence, these days i felt that human being is so complicated and not to mention about the way they deal with their friends.
However, I should move on with my life. Therefore, I will appreciate and enjoy every moment spent with my family, friends and the most important is you.

Tuesday-August 10 2010

Today, i feel sucks. Something happened during our presentation. Those seniors was acting as thou they are "miss know everything". At first, I am pissed with their attitude. But later on, I just don't give a damn. As long as my friends understand me, nothing matters. There is no need to explain to someone who are "blind" and "deaf". You just wasting your time. These words crossed over my mind at that time. On the other hand, it was a relieved to finish the assignments on time. In addition, the encouragement that you gave helps me a lot. Without you, I will probably give up on the middle of the journey. Not to forget, credits to my friends. Well, that wraps up my day.

Tuesday-Aug 03 2010

Day 400. I was kind of busy with my assignment for the past few weeks. Today we went to Tomato Ketchup for dinner. It was located at east lake. The food served was quite nice and reasonable for the price. 4 of us enjoy the dinner there.

Nothing much happened between us recently, just that we had a longer chat in FB. At first, I doesn't know the reason for being so excited when chatting with you but now i know why. My feelings turned rebellious and causes me to become out of my mind. I am started to miss you again or maybe i never did forget about you. However, I doesn't want to have more crazy thoughts or imaginations about what is going to happen next between us. I just wish to be your best friends forever.

Saturday- July 10 2010

Many things had changed as time passed by. Our "friendship's cycle" had changed due to some incidents. Strong winds blows away happy moments from the memory, while dissatisfaction conquers the emotions. Weak minds try to defend their fort of innocent thoughts. I realised that the value of frendship that I treasured the most will soon robbed by the time. However, I still foolishly hoping that all of us will get back to the way we are before all this incidents, slowly. Words are not enough to express my feelings now. Now, I can only says that I feel so dissapounted and exhausted. On top of it, it leaves a deeper hole inside my wounded heart.

Its been 376 days since we bumped on each other. For the past few days, you appeared in my dream. Inside the dream, I was softly hugging you and we both staying silence throughout the night. The weather seems so cold but I can only feel your warm body surrounding my soul. I was so comfortable. It seems so real that it was hard for me to differiantiate whether it was just virtual or reality. However, I realised that it was just a dream. When I woke up, I was wondering the reason that you appeared in my dream. Maybe, recently I was feeling unhappy and wish that you may appear by my side to comfort me. Even though, it was just a dream I feel satisfied and happy to start off my day. Thank you, my dear friend ^0^v

Monday-June 21 2010

After came back from the UTAR FILM FESTIVAL 2010, i was busy with my assignments. The film festival was quite nice because i learned meaningful things not only about entertainment industry but also about our life from the interview session with two famous director, Director Chiu and Director Ho. The presence of her at the festival made my day even more perfect. I cant keep her away from my sight during the trip. I think its been a while since i am able to stare at her for this long. Well, now i am back in Kampar again and those assignments is sapping all my brain juice away. However, i will try best to deal with it. Good night.z.z.Z

Sunday-June 13 2010

Now, i am back in Kampar after a 3 days 2 night trip at Genting Highlands. Well, we departed from Kampar on Friday's night and reached Kuala Kubu Bahru , around 1 and a half hours later. Then, we stayed at Deborah's house for the rest of our trip. Deborah's mom was a straight forward type, strict and a caring mother. While, her dad was a person that loves his family so much. For her sister, Miriam, she was a bit quiet but she always laugh along with us. The next day we went to Genting early in the morning with excitement. Unfortunately, not long after we reached there, it started to rain. Therefore, we spent most of our time indoor. We ran around the mall, watched movies, played bowling, ate McD and entered casino. In the end, we still managed to have some fun at the theme park before we left the hill. Even though we feels disappointed but we still enjoy the trip and it is something memorable for us. In conclusion, nothing is more important than being close with our FRIENDS.

Monday-May 24 2010

Well, its been a while. I am not on the mood to write anything on this page till these day. Nothing seems to work for me. Either in coping with my daily problems nor my affections. Everything that i did doesn't make any sense. As if i was lost inside "myself". Sometimes it seems that i am so open minded and get along with your decisions but the truth is, i am not. I always think that i can let u go easily but i can't. My heart is so fragile, my body is so weak and my tears drop easily. I knew the chance for us getting together never exist, but why am i still waiting and hoping something to happen between us? I am the biggest loser and idiot in this universe. I always wanted to dig deeper into your past so that i will know you even better. But, i only suffered more for doing so. Tears accompany me from day to day. Loneliness surrounds me. Everyday i tried to not think about it and act as thou i am alright in front of you. So that, we can maintain our friendship and continues giving you courage to face your nightmare. I think that's all i wanted to say for now.

Thursday-May 13 2010

Well, its my last day in Kampar for this semester. Well, i tried to spent more valuable time with my friends here instead of going back to my hometown earlier. It's been a wonderful moments spending my time with them. As the matter of fact, hanging around with your friends is part of the uni life. Time goes by with a blink of an eye. I had been here for a year. I tried to remember what's happened last year at this time. All our experiences and time we spent together will be treasured inside my heart forever. I guess thats all i wana say for the mean time. Wish you all good luck in the exam and happy holidays ^0^v

Sunday- May 9 2010

Finally, I realize,

That I am nothing without you,

I was so wrong,

Forgive me,

My broken heart like a wave,

My shaken heart like a wind,

My heart vanished like smoke,

It can’t be remove like a tattoo,

I sigh deeply as if a ground is going to cave in,

Only dust are piled up in my mind,

I thought I wouldn’t be able to live even one day without you,

But, somehow I manage to live on longer than I thought,

You don’t answer anything as I cry out “I miss you”,

I hope for a vain expectation but now it’s useless,

What is it about that person next to you, did he make you cry?

Dear, can you even see me, did you forget completely?

I am worried; I feel anxiety because I can’t get close nor try to talk to you,

I spend long nights by myself, erasing my thoughts a thousand times,

Don’t look back and leave,

Don’t find me again and live on,

Because I have no regrets from loving you,

Take only the good memories,

I can bear it in some way,

I can stand in some way,

You should be happy if you are like this,

Day by day I become dull,

Oh girl, I cry,

You are my all, say goodbye,

If we pass by each other on the street,

Act like you didn’t see me and go the way you were walking to,

If you keep thinking about our past memories,

I might go look for you secretly,

Always be happy with him, so I won’t ever get a different mind,

Even smallest regret won’t be left out ever,

Please live well as if I should feel jealous,

You should always be like that bright sky, like that white cloud,

Yes, you should always smile like that as if nothing happened,

I hope your heart feels relieved after living me,

Those tears will dry completely as time passes by,

It would’ve hurt less if we didn’t meet at all,

Hope you will bury our promise of being together forever,

Oh my love, you are my heart, say goodbye.

Finally, the long awaited time has come. The battle was over. Everything seems back to normal again, after few weeks of chaos cause by the exam. Everybody looks burn out while saying good bye to our final exams, so do I. After the exam, we went to KFC. It’s been a while since I went there. The mouth watering aroma of the fried chicken opens up my appetite. Later we all went to FECCA and unexpectedly, Deborah and her gang shows up. We were stuck there while waiting for the rain to stop. Hence, I missed the barbeque party organized by our development trend tutorial group. But, few hours later, it was still raining cats and dogs. So, we decided to walk to LFK for dinner. An hour later, as calculated by Ben the rain stops. We heads home for a bath and later meets up at Adrian’s place. We played with his sugar glider, chit chatting and drink a bottle of vodka, where my cheek was blushing. Later at midnight, we went to FECCA for the second time of the day and that’s how the day ends. Well, I woke up at 4pm today because we are going to play badminton at 4.30. Later we went for steamboat. It was the first time that Tze Wei was joining us for dinner. Everyone make fun of her and we all laughed together. The atmosphere was so nice. It looks like a family gathering, where all of us sitting around a table and enjoying our delicious meal with a big smile on the face of everybody. After filling our empty stomach with a “horse”, we went to FECCA. Well, something happened to both my friend. I don’t know much how it happened but I hope that our friendship will never be affected by the incident. Friendship is much more precious than any other things in this world.

A friendship might be fragile but a true friendship will never break off. (Wee, 2010)

Monday-May 03 2010

Today is another historical day in my life. I was fallen in the battlefield. This is due to my lack of preparations and underestimated the power of the enemy. I lost the most important things in the battle. The fierce and unscrupulous "monster" took away my "confidence", living me nothing beside this coward body of mine. How am I going to face the remaining battles without my spear of confidence? I was pushed by the enemy to the edge of the cliff. Waiting for a miracle to save me and throw me back into the battle. While in the mean time, I should take a siesta first.

Saturday-May 01 2010

It's already May and i am in d middle of the "battle field" without any tricks up my sleeve. I am like a harmless guy and going for a suicide. Well, i just have to push those things aside first. So, back to the story. Ian was back today and it means that our "knight family" finally reunite. As usual, we went for dinner at old town market and later we went for "exercise". In addition, as usual JY was pissed off while playing DOTA. Me and Ben laughed to each other when we both saw it. I don't know about others, but for me playing Dota together is suppose to be a fun and happy activity. Why should we get stressed or pissed off? WEIRD. Before i forgotten, today is Mars' birthday. We wished him happy birthday. I hope that he will do well in the exam and happy always. Last but not least, i had commented in your blog. I hope you don't mind. Actually i wanted to say something that may comfort you but i doesn't know how to express it in words. I am such a dumb ass. Therefore, hope that you can pinch me again. You may pinch me as hard as possible. I will be happy if you do so. Wish that you all will be flourish by happiness and love.

Tuesday-April 27 2010

Well, it's been a boring and mood less weekends for me without your existence. I was sitting under a lamp post and the surroundings is so dark that I cant even see my own fingers. The dim light of the lamp post almost vanished in the eternal darkness of the night. The moon on the sky was slowly swallowed by the dark clouds. I was sitting there alone having a deep feeling of loneliness while looking at your messages inside my hand phone. Well, I decided to have a conversation with you. I felt so happy being able to chat with you and I am having a sweet dreams later. I wanted to tell you that my day moving smoothly while you made it become perfect.

Love is surrounding us....
Live our life to the fullest....
Love everyone around us...
Live happily in the moment...
Love you always ♥

Friday-April 23 2010

Yesterday was our last lecture for this semester. We watched a nice movie for the lecture. The title for the movie is " Good Will Hunting". The content is about how a counselor deals with his client also a genius in mathematics. A lot of things that can we learn from the movie. Well, it marks the end of our first year in the university. Time pass by with a blink of an eye. In this period of time, many things had happened.Such as, I get to know a group of bombastic friends, becoming more mature, doing a lot of crazy stuffs, and lastly falling for her. For the past few days i didn't have the opportunity to chat with her because she didn't online. My heart was in complete emptiness.In addition, i just checked my coursework marks, and its totally sucks. It's going to be a bumpy ride in my final exams. Haiz~

Wednesday-April 21 2010

Well, it's been a long time since i posted something here due to my lackadaisical attitude. For the past few days i had been spending my whole day in cyber cafe nonetheless than playing DOTA with my friends. That's the only thing i can do since i faced some difficulty to online at my house. Cursed you, Tmnet for providing us with this kind of sucks service. Beside being carried away by the fun of playing computer games, i never forget to take a peeps on your blog. Hmm~ what can i say yeah??? I feels happy that you are feeling better from day to day but in the mean time i feels curious to know who is the person that made such a deep impact in your life. I know that he might be someone thats really important to you. However, it doesn't matters now because i know that you has slowly walk away from your dark past. Past events will transform to memories and treasured in one's heart. What's important is the present and the future. Wish that you will have a save journey back to your hometown by now and happy always^0^v

Wednesday-April 14 2010

Hmm~ Today, I am back to my unhealthy lifestyles. I doesn't know whats going to happen to me. Haiz~Not much happening today and my day seems to flow smoothly. It's quite boring. But, I felt happy because you told me that you will be alright and moves on happily. Finally, I hope that you will be positive, keep smiling and be happy ^0^v

Tuesday-April 13 2010

It was kind of weird that no matter how old is the person, they can't run away from being childish. It's an undeniable facts because for the past few days I can see clearly how an adult can turn out to be as childish as a 3 years old kid. In my opinion is not bad or embarrassing to act in a childish manner but sometimes it may affect the feelings of those around you. There are borderlines in each and everyone of us. When you cross it unintentionally, you may be forgiven. But, if it was done on purpose then sorry to tell you that," please fork off from my life". I don't give a damn to befriend with some one that is selfish. You may think that your friends are using you for their own benefits, but do you ever spend a second to reflect yourself whether you have asked some one for help? People always look things in one way rather than looking things as a whole. They always look at other people weaknesses rather than theirs. Sometimes people thinks that its not worthy to help other people because you wont get anything for return other than hardship to yourself. I realize that it is a bullshit to spill out such words in this realistic world, however, if everyone put themselves in front of others, then we are nonetheless similar to robots or machines. Maybe they are dependent on you today but who knows what will happens tomorrow. We should always think out of the box. Thats why "it was easy to start a relationship, but the tricky part is to maintain it". Have a good day.^0^v

Friday-April 09 2010

Good morning, sunshine. It's the 1st time i write this blog in the morning. I just woke up from a long long nap. It was because I felt extremely exhausted due to the preparations for our presentation. But, our sacrifices worth it. Now, I am listening to my favorite song, Wedding Dress by Tae Yang while enjoying a cup of hot cereal drinks. We started our presentations last week and it ended yesterday. Yesterday was our best presentation for this semester. I felt satisfied with our performances even though we are all worn out. The day before, we went to shoot few videos and edited it until wee hours. Yesterday, I read your blog again. When I went through it, I felt sad and useless because I can't do anything for you when you are drowning in the sea of tears. Each and every words of yours touched my heart deeply. I doesn't know what is the reason you are in such condition but I hope that when you need someone to hang on to, I am the one of the person you will approach. There are times when I tried to give you courage by words, but I know that it wasn't enough. When you said that you are lonely, I wanted to tell you that actually you are not. You will never be alone. You have a lot of friend that loves and supports you. Don't make them feels worry about you. You have to become brave each and every time you had cried, not only for yourself but also them. Now my only wish is to wait for the Cai Ling i knew in the past to reappear.

Friday- April 01 2010

Hmm~yesterday was April's Fool...a lot of things had happened. I even overslept. Gosh. When I woke up, it was raining heavily outside and I went out for dinner with my friends. After dinner, I was a bit shock when I heard something unexpected from my friend. At first, I don't know whether she is serious or joking around but after listening to her explanation, I can confirm that it was true. I don't know how to express my feelings. I felt mix feelings inside me. I am happy about it but in the mean time I felt clueless. Therefore, I am asking her to give us some time to make clear of our feelings. Beside, I am afraid of being hurt again. Its already wee hours, I guess that I should go for bed. Good night.z.z.Z

Camera Pika Pika by Me, Jy, Ian, and Ben a.k.a the Bombastic 4

and special thanks to Deborah for lending her DSLR

What does the word L.O.V.E stands for?? It stands for Legs Open Very Enjoy... Then, how about the words MAKE L.O.V.E?? It stands for Make Legs Open Very Enjoy...

(Ben & Wee,2010)

Wednesday-Mar 31 2010

Today we get the pay for helping our tutor. I had a sore throat but still i ate fried chicken and ice cream.woots~ now my throats feel miserable.haiz~ Its raining cats and dogs after our class but we still cycled home. Its really fun. We straight away coma when we reached home. I feels hungry now. I am going out for supper later.Good night.z.z.Z